Newcomer's Question Corner:

[Andrew Wood]

I think there's a lot of us on this site who are new to meditation and other Buddhist practices, and thought it might be helpful to have our own little corner where we can ask questions to those who have been at it a little longer.

[Andrew Wood]

Okay! So here's my burning question. I really want to get some meditation pillows (a Zafu and Zabuton) for my apartment. Is there a good place to buy them here in Columbus? or would I be better off getting them offline? What sites would you recommend I check out? and are there different kinds that are better than others?

[Jim Ellsworth]

HI Andrew,

Thanks for posting this forum. It's a great idea.

I've found that having a comfortable cushion definitely makes home practice a bit more inviting. If I've learned anything about buying cushions though, it's just that waiting a bit before buying is a good idea. You seem to like the green gomden and green zabuton from the center. You might want to take it home for a few weeks and see if you still enjoy sitting with it (it's mine so borrowing it isn't a problem). You could also compare it to some of the traditional buckwheat zafus that Daron has brought in for his group (and that we've been borrowing!).

I just think waiting is a good idea since the sets can be expensive and since I've learned that some cushions are definitely more amenable to sitting for long periods than others. Personally I prefer the orange and red kapok zafu that Shambhala usually has hidden away. But I bought two other meditation sets before I learned how comfortable it is.

There are a couple of places in town that sell cushions but they seemed a bit pricey for the quality when I was looking (this may have changed). Two good online resources are Samadhi Cushions and Dharma Crafts. Samadhi Cushions is having a 20% off sale for the winter. Let me know if you plan to order online since there might be others who want to buy one too. We could save on shipping.

[Andrew Wood]

Hey Jim! Thanks for responding so quick!
Haha waiting is not my strong suit but I think thats probably a good idea. I'll check out those websites when I get the chance too and let you know if I decide on anything. :)

[Jim Ellsworth]

Hi Andrew,

I forgot to add: removable covers are good too. They're more expensive but washable.

[Jim Ellsworth]

In my experience, there is no one answer to this question. It's why I sometimes find it difficult to give instructions to people brand new to meditation. If I hold too tightly to the pat instructions to "come back to what is already there and rest" or "return to the experience of the body breathing," then I tend to feel very claustrophobic and frustrated and there's a potential to give up too quickly. But if I simply let my mind wander all over the place without any attempt to bring it back to the bodyheartmind breathing (to borrow George's phrase!), then the meditation can be relaxing while doing it but bring little to no long-term change in how I experience life. It's about finding a middle path between two extremes: of energizing and relaxing. "Not too tight--not too loose."

We'll have to look up that analogy about the horse and see exactly how it's writtten. I think it's from Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind but I might be mistaken. It's been many years since I've read that book.

Today I took the Metra from Waukegan into Chicago. When I got off, I walked mindfully to get a Heart happy pomegranate smoothie from Jamba Juice and stood just off to the side drinking it, feeling the connection of my feet on the ground. Waves and waves of people went rushing through as each train arrived, most rushing by. It was almost exhilirating to feel a sense of groundedness and to experience the rush around me, without being swept up in it. So many sights and sounds seemed to dance before me. I noticed details I'd have never caught before. And I remembered the times when I'd felt overly "compulsed" to move through space and time to get to some insecure destination. This was so much better. And I somehow managed to engage in a few spontaneous conversations. It's true, the world opens up completely when we stop fighting it!

[Jim Ellsworth]

Marissa,

Can you tell us more about why the horse analogy works for you? Do you feel a need to give the horse of your thoughts a spacious pasture to run off all the excess energy until it wears itself out and comes back to rest?

[Jim Ellsworth]

"so maybe it's really going to take a combination of both, of letting my mind run free a bit until i remember what i'm trying to do in the first place and then return to the body and the breath."

That's pretty close to what I've figured out. The brain wanders and likes to wander. It's part of why humans have evolved into such a successful species. But my brain is also so prone to delusion, inappropriate emotional reactivity, cravings that become obsessive, rumination, and fantasy, and others, that I've learned that it's important to make some attempt to come back to what's actually happening in the present moment. So I come back to the experience of the body breathing, to the sounds I'm hearing, etc. And the benefits have really been great.

When you said you WANT to let the mind wander, that's when I suggested you try a weekend retreat. Though longer meditation periods can be difficult at first, there always seems to be a time when the thoughts drop by themselves and you find yourself sitting on the cushion and relaxed in the present moment. Of course, then you recognize it and it's gone. But it does creep up on you, and once you've known the experience, it tends to come back again.

I encourage you to experiment in practice to begin to make the practice your own. That's so much better than trying to follow some pre-conceived notion that you read in a book or heard from a talk. If you don't experiment, you'll always be comparing what's actually happening to what you think "should" be happening. And that can be a way of fighting experience rather than opening to it.

You mentioned working out regularly on an elliptical trainer. Have you ever tried to go at a really fast pace? What happens? You start going so fast and feel like you're going to fall off. Eventually you slow down. And have you ever had such low energy that you slouch on the thing and slow the pace down to almost zero. The machine reacts by increasing resistance to get you to step up the pace. Each new day, you adjust your pace to what your body needs on that day. And you learn not to judge your entire routine based on one particular workout. Instead you make a commitment to work out and then come back to it again and again. You look for results in the changes that happen in your body over time. It's kind of similar with meditation.

[Jim Ellsworth]

Hey Marissa,

I've been looking for that horse analogy but can’t seem to find it. I can't remember if it was from McLeod, from Pema, or from Trungpa. For all I know it might be from a classical Pali teaching or one that's simply been passed on by many teachers.

I did find a quote about sheep and cows from Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind. (pp. 32-23) Will this do? :)

"The best way to control people is to encourage them to be mischievous. Then they will be in control in its wider sense. To give your sheep or cow a large, spacious meadow is the way to control him. So it is with people: first let them do what they want, and watch them. This is the best policy. To ignore them is not good; that is the worst policy. The second worst is trying to control them. The best one is to watch them, just to watch them, without trying to control them.

The same way works for yourself as well. If you want to obtain perfect calmness in your zazen, you should not be bothered by the various images you find in your mind. Let them come, and let them go. Then they will be under control. But this policy is not so easy. It sounds easy, but it requires special effort. How to make this kind of effort is the secret of practice. Suppose you are sitting under some extraordinary circumstances. If you try to calm your mind, you will be unable to sit, and if you try not to be disturbed, your effort will not be the right effort. The only effort that will help you is to count your breathing, or to concentrate on your inhaling and exhaling. We say concentration, but to concentrate your mind is not the true purpose of Zen. The true purpose is to see things as they are, to observe things as they are, and to let everything go as it goes. This is to put everything under control in its widest sense."

That kind of gives you the idea of how Shunryu Suzuki uses the analogy. Personally, I think it'd be better to use the methods that Ken gives in his Releasing Emotional Reactions retreat when faced with a situation of "extraordinary circumstances." Working with strong emotions, in attention, can lead to their transformation.